Adventures in Moderation Management

Since we don't have a physical meeting in Baltimore for Moderation Management (at least not yet), I thought I should share some of my own experiences.  I'll also try to keep some of these posts short so that readers don't have to spend too much time here.  Help through anecdotal recollection is great, but I realize most people would just like me to get to the point.

The story I'll be sharing today deals with making decisions when it comes to drinking, and this was one of the times that I was proud of my decision.  This past Saturday, I attended a family dinner at my parents' house.  My wife and I arrived with our kids at about 5:30pm, and we both had a beer.  In the "old days," I would have been finished that beer in about 10 minutes and headed to the fridge for another.  Now I make a habit of sipping rather than gulping as I consume a beverage, so it took me closer to a half an hour to finish that one on Saturday evening.

Here's the good part: I finished my beer around the same time that my wife finished hers.  Then, she asked me if I could go and get her another one, and I did.  Instead of getting another one for myself, however, I grabbed a can of diet ginger ale instead.  I'm at the point where I can actually feel one drink on an empty stomach, and I was more interested in just having something to drink with dinner.  I also wanted to see how I would feel if I stopped after one beer.  I usually stop after two these days and my wife was having another one, so I wondered if it would it feel weird to stop.  Well, it didn't end up feeling weird, but I did surprise myself.  The surprise came from the feeling that after I chose ginger ale instead of a beer, I didn't think of having another beer.  It feels great to make that decision and feel comfortable with it.  A year ago, I would have had at least two more without even thinking about it.

Later on, at home, I opened the refrigerator and saw one of those tasty craft beers that I love sitting on the shelf.  I was a little thirsty and wanted to relax, but I didn't take the beer.  The old disease model of drinking states that eventually, I'll just give in and start pounding beers again.  But the old disease model didn't count on me actually learning new habits and having faith in myself.  

This would be a good time to insert a disclaimer; if anyone out there reading this has given up drinking, I'm not trying to convert you to an MM person.  The statements I'm making could really churn up some strong feelings for some people, so please keep in mind that my intended audience is drinkers who are wondering if moderation is the right choice.  I've said it before and I'll keep saying that moderation management is not for everyone and it does take work.  That's why MM stresses the importance of commitment and peer support.  Just as members of AA look to their past mistakes so that they don't repeat them, members of MM need to remember theirs as well.  I consider good habits to be just like a fit body.  If one takes the time to learn good, healthy habits, those habits should become a part one's life permanently.  It's just like the dieter who loses weight by exercising and eating less.  Results are wonderful, but seeing those results fade as a person regresses into bad habits is sad or potentially tragic.  

I'm rattling on here just like I promised I would not, but I want to add one more little accomplishment that has helped me find success in my moderation of alcohol.  I've ramped up my exercise regimen during the past few months, and I've been satisfied with the results.  I'd go so far as to say that I'm even impressed with my results.  

I've always enjoyed physical activity because of the obvious benefits.  Over the years, I've been into swimming, hiking, biking, running, and lifting weights.  I didn't do them all at the same time, but in different amounts at various points.  I just feel good, in general, when I stay active and keep myself in decent shape.  But lately, things have been different.  And by different, I mean better!  I'm looking and feeling better at 40 than I did at 30.  My waist is smaller, I have more energy, and I look more defined.  I wondered how this could even be possible, but then I remembered some of the effects alcohol has on the body.  For one thing, excess calories from beer and other assorted drinks made me put on excess fat that obscured my lean tissue.  Too much alcohol also affects a man's hormone levels, so testosterone was not being produced at optimal levels in order to support lean body mass and energy levels when I was pounding beers all the time.  You know those people with really healthy-looking bodies who get up early to work out?  Yeah, they probably don't drink a lot.  Whether you enjoy fitness and working out or not, it feels better to look and feel healthy.  If you are examining your life as you read this, I guarantee that you will feel better if you find a way to live without drinking excessively.  Just do whatever it takes - exercise, get involved in your community, start taking classes - in order to truly realize that life is worth living and you don't need a buzz to enjoy it.